Friday, January 30, 2009

concerts...

omg..
rihanna will be performing in February..
JasonMraz will be performing in March..
and also,in March,Sunburst will be going on..


ARGHHHH!!!!
oh gosh,i hope free tickets for JM and SUNBURST will just fall from the sky..
im dying to go for JM and SUNBURST,
i dont wanna history to repeat,like Avril's concert...
darn it..
damn it..

anyone has extra tickets?
free tickets for me perhaps?
anyone?
hmmm....

Friday, January 23, 2009

hurmpp!!

well well..
so i found out..
the DLSR camera cost RM1870...
thank god i have great aunties n uncles..
me aunt said she can help me 1st..


to think about all this,
life is a great adventure..
what u think,that's what will be..
i shud try being positive yeah?!
hurmpp..


oh ied?
im still being left hanging in this relationship..
again,i have another bf,
its been bout 3days,
the feelings is fading/not there anymore i think..
hmm..


izzit possible that i have been black magic-ed??
hahaha...
i dunno la..but i think i wont accept the facts..
maybe if he comes back,
i wonder,
how will it be then..
hurmpp!!

Friday, January 16, 2009

ZOMFG!!!money money money!you're so funny!!!

ZOMG!!!
i own my very own WACOM now..for those who doesnt knoe wat wacom is,its like a electronic sketch pad that u connects to the computer n use photoshop to draw..
that cost me RM570..hmm..pity my parents..go bankrupt because of me..
and...
my last semester fees,still havent been settled fully...this sem too..hmmm...
and...
today's class,digital photography..its great..and i have to get my very own canon/nikon digital SLR camera..so happy...but...that's gonna cost a fortune..hmmm...
oh gosh...
how easy life was when you were a kid,and u dont have to take all this shit to count..u dont have to crack your head thinking bout all these shit..hmmm...
if only...
the rich realize how terrible the poor feels and dont brag around/show off..
if only...
the poor cud feel how the rich feels...
hmmm...
if only my life wud be easier..
oh i bet that line is being used by almost all the other human beings in this world yah..
i wonder if the aliens in other planets use the same line too..
hmmm...

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

confession!!

i have a confession to make...make that confessionssss...

-im a camwhore!!!for proof,please look at my facebook pictures!
-im so into men in uniform..
-im a coke addict..
-coke makes me drunk(i behave crazy after drinking coke)
-im over protective over my close frens(its not that i want to..its just in me since those days..maybe coz i luv them..)
-i love animals more than i love humans!
-im too poor to be living on earth..
-i hate sex..
-my brains says quit smoking,my heart says keep smoking..
-i really love my sisters..i think..
-i love my car so much..i call it 'baby'..i even talk to it when im driving alone..hmm..
-i have another person,living in my head..
-im a psychotic,lunatic,funnytic person!

hmm..shud i continue r?well,its already 2am now..maybe i shudnt..or i will go crazy..haha..


btw,I LOVE IED!!weeee....IM STILL WAITING FOR IEDrus...hmm..

Thursday, January 08, 2009

not the first,but the last!

Memang kau bukan yang pertama..
Tapi aku janji,kau yang terakhir..
Kerna kau begitu istimewa buatku..


Iedrus is special..
Iedrus is sweet..
He's different than other men..

I will love him..
I will cherish every moments I have with him..
He will,forever,be in my heart..

Even though i go through hard times right now waiting..
Even though i suffer a lot waiting..
It's okay..
I will take the pain..
I will go through it all..


Bak kata peribahasa,
susah susah dahulu,
senang senang kemudian..


Right?

love and life...

why is it that love is so complicating?
why is it that i have to be so blinded by love?

why is it that men are so hard to be understood?
why is it that im left here hanging?

why is it that im changing?
why is it that im growing?

why is it that im becoming more complicated?
why are there so many questions?

but love,isn't it meant to be beautiful?
isn't love meant to be wonderful?

and life,isn't it meant to be nice?
isn't life meant to be great?

hmmm...
questions after questions,
i guess one cannot hide from all that..

Monday, January 05, 2009

how does it feel

"How Does It Feel"

I'm not afraid of anything
I just need to know that i can breathe
I don't need much of anything
But suddenly, suddenly

I am small and the world is big
All around me is fast moving
Surrounded by so many things
But suddenly, suddenly

[Chorus]
How does it feel, to be different from me?
Are we the same?
How does it feel, to be different from me?
Are we the same?
How does it feel?

I'm young, and I am free
But I get tired, and I get weak
I get lost, and I can't sleep
But suddenly, suddenly

[Chorus]

[Bridge]
Would you comfort me
Would you cry with me;

Ahh, ahh, ahh-ah
ahh, ahh-ah
ahh, ahh-ah
ahh, ahh-ah
Ahh, ahh, ahh-ah
ahh, ahh-ah
ahh, ahh-ah
ahh, ahh-ah

I am small and the world is big
But I'm not afraid of anything;

[Chorus x2]

[Ending (background)]
How does it feel [x2]
Different from me, different...
(ahh, ahh, ahh-ah;
ahh-ah,
ahh-ah,
ahh, ahh, ahh-ah;
ahh-ah,
ahh-ah)

this song,represent my feelings at this very moment..been few days actually..i feel so lost..i feel so confused..i think i have a problem,but i cant seem to identify it..is it bcoz of ied?or bcoz of parents?or bcoz its just time of my life,againnnn??hmmm...gosh,i've been day dreaming this past few days..like im in my own world..termenung sorang2..even when i drive..but i dont know what im thinking of...
i need to get away....just away from everyone..everything..
i feel so tired...sooo tired...
im just a 22+year old girl..
but the things i have to face,is like a 10person's things n problems...hmmmm...
when?when will all this stop?
one after one after one after one...
im too tired..
i asked myself..i asked god..
what's the point of me,still breathing,still living in this world...
coz im so tired..too tired..

Saturday, January 03, 2009

complicated..what shud i put my status as??

shud i declare myself as 'single'?
shud i declare myself as 'its complicated'?
or shud i just stay as it is now...'married'?

its so confusing..
everything is so memeningkan..
im so hurt..
but im still waiting..
but negative thoughts are on my mind now..

im thinking..
what if,he thinks i have moved on?
what if,he has forgotten me?
what if?what if?what if?

stressssss bangat gwe!!!!
arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh........

right now,at this very moment..
standing on top of a mountain n screammm my heart out!

darn damn love!!arghhh...

read it..

this is a comment i made to someone's post..tapi it seems that it suit to be here...

that night,i made decision not to go out so i stayed at my sister's 18th floor apartment in w.maju just to c the view of kl..i felt too old to celebrate all those nonsense..

but on jan 1st,at bout 7.40am,my sister woke me up,she said her sister in law is in the ER..then i mandi,to get ready gi hospital,then she told me,sister in law dia,dah meninggal..i was too shocked..till today,i still cant believe..maybe korang ada dgr dlm brita..kete satria neo putih..dkt2 jln tun razak..

the worst part,im thinkin,am i a heartless person?the fact that tears couldnt flow,made me more dissapointed wit my self..i was sad sampai badan bergetar,muka blur sbb tak leh percaya,tapi air mata tanak mengalir..hmm..

kesimpulannye,i just wanted to say,what a way to start a brand new year..sadness..

kepada kamu2 semua,berhati2lah di jalan raya..and,dont get so happy,coz u may never know when ur time is..dan janganlah kamu lupa pada mereka yang melahirkan kamu,dan mereka yang telah bersama kamu dalam suka dan duka..

have u say 'i love you' to ur parents today?

brain jam..

bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...going crazy...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...do u understand...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...do u feel it...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...i cant take it too...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...does it hurt...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...shoot me...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...bRaiN jAm...
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do u feel brain jam after reading this?coz im having brain jam..so many things on my lil brain..
im one person,but the things i deal with,is like 10 people's problems..
hmmm...dunno la...
let it be..let it be..i'll just see what god have for me..
oh..that rhymes..
ok now...cheers!!

death...the way my brand new year started..

what a way to start a brand new year..
i started new year with a death in my family..
my brother in law's sister..a 20 year old girl..
super smart girl..got number 2 in her uni..
thank god,2008 has changed me..
i realize that i was too old for all the nonsense of life(clubbin&going out too much)..
well,i hope,her soul will rest in peace..
i will remember her,as she was..a happy bubbly person..
*alfatihah to nur salina bt mat wahab*