Bullshitting101~#2

written on: 18th June 2009(before i came to my senses)

well,once upon a time,i learned that if you love someone,you gotta learn to let the person go...
yes,i am ready to let the person go...
but kan,like i said,and many people say,EVERYONE DESERVE A 2ND CHANCE la...
i must fight for it..right?
hmm..if i give up,like how i always give up,then,no point la...no point in living..
but,the thing that pisses me off,is that u dont quit something u just started la!!haishh...
sadis taw...sadis...cam pengecut pun ada...macam pesalah pun ada...uhhhh,cheeky..hehehehe...

aku memang merindui dia,yeah,i do really miss him...but,i cant force someone into loving me la kan..hehe..i only can hope..and dream..and keep on dreaming..but we did have a plan..didnt we..but its ok...maybe i wasnt the one who was suppose to be in that plan..its ok..i totally understand...
people,remember,"DONT EVER LEAVE SOMEONE HANGING WITH A MILLION QUESTIONS"
people,remember,"DO NOT QUIT SOMETHING U STARTED,IF U WANNA QUIT,DONT START IT.."
same goes to marriage...
hahaha...well,i guess,when u r really heartbroken crashed crushed(wow),u just go crazy for a bit,but,if u r strong enuf,u can move on,u can do it,even though the memories haunts u down...but i know,i am strong enuf..and at least,i changed..thanks for that special person who made me change...i became a lil bit more girly,and i feel hard to simply swear,and i sing happy songs like 'always look at the bright side of life'...hehehe...
but,somehow,i tot that person was different,really different,but,it turns out that he was just the same as the others...takperla...kita belajar dari pengajaran...
aku pun xkan jadi pushy...aku akan jadi penyabar...and,who knows,soon,nathra will wear tudung(feels like it laaaaa)...hehehe...neways,i love that person,and always will...but i will mend back my broken heart like i always do...hehehehe...
but,hey,THANK U...

~xoxo

W.E.M.L.

well well...
i guess,if i wud be given a nickname,i wud be call,'the confused one'...who doesnt even know of what she wants in life...

1) i dont know if what i said before,bout not loving iedrus,was true or was just because i found someone new...
2) i am being a desperate bitch rite now,arent i?coz im looking for iedrus again...
3) i can move on from being dump..i found out the truth..not from sharif though...i realized,it was my mistake all along..i pushed him too hard,that i accidentally pushed him away..
4) i told my friend that i wanna banned 27th june in my life,meaning no presents,no wishes,but,i really dont know how true i want that...hmmm..
5) i dont know if i still love iedrus,but,i really really do miss him alot...
6) i've lost my mind,i cannot think anymore,its like,i lost my brains or something...y?
7) but im already fine from being dumped...
8) actually,signs were there all along,that me and sharif mmg xserasi from the start..he is just him,and im me...we r two different people with different likings...hmm...no wonder everyday i sure sing 'kita berdua,jauh berbeza,langit dan bumi,blablabla' everytime after i reach home from seeing him...haha...

see...and there's more going on...hmmm...

"WhatEvaMajorLoser-W.E.M.L."

-xoxo-

bullshitting101~#1

life isn't as bad as i thought it is..
doesn't mean that, one thing in your life goes away,you gotta be down..
if you have great friends,they just know how to make u feel better..
well,shit happens in life,rite?and,everything happens for a reason..
and,i know,everybody hates to be left hanging...hmm..
i wonder,what awaits me ahead..
will i end up having the one i love as the one?
will i be working in the advertising line as what im studying now?
will i be a successful person?
will i have a great life ahead?
will i be able to move on in life when im heartbroken?
i guess,its up to me right?its how i colour that white piece of cloth...
yeah...after all this crying and saying that i wanna die and stupid stuff like that,
i came to my senses...i came back to earth...i can do it..so what if just because of one stupid shit that happened,i have to screw up...unless,i am and was born to just screw up(hehehe)...
well,one thing u all gotta know,nathra is a very very negative and impatient person...
oh,talking about impatient,
dear friends,who've ive hurt,no matter what way ive hurt u,i wanna apologize..
and,people,remember,no matter how lost u feel,how angry u feel,how stupid u feel,EVERYONE DESERVE A 2ND CHANCE...
and,to all u mabukers out there-"DRINKING IS NOT A SOLUTION!!!"
and,to all u cowards or messed up people out there,-"TALKING IS THE BEST SOLUTION"~that's what adults do(if u say u r matured laaa)...

p/s:sorrie if this note singgung u readers feelings...this is my bullshitting mind speaking...hehe..
~XOXO

replied back msg...

hi..u xpenah sakitkan ati i,walaupun yeah,i ada xpuas ati dengan u..sharif,what happen to u?ini bukanlah sharif yang i kenal?i ada sakitkan hati u ke?i ada singgung perasaan u ke?hmm..kenapa u tetibe jadi camni?izzit because im just to clingy?sharif,the past was meant to be in the past...u met me for a reason..but now u r quitting what u started...i nak faham u..i know,inside u,there's this whole new wonderful person in there...u need to move on from the past...i accepted who u are...i choose u...sharif,apa maksud u dengan keserasian antara kita tiada?i tidak merasakan camtu pun...i tried to talk to u,but u seem to not open up to me..and,on saturday,u said u ada something nak bincang dengan i,is this the matter?kalau ye,ini bukan berbincang namanya sharif...u r just running away...y?talk to me...lets meet up,and talk...adults talk,so come,lets talk...face to face...look me in the eye,and tell me all this...one last time...
p/s:ur ayat gile jiwang..didnt know u cud say things yg berbunga2...and,i miss ya,we really did actually have something special...

this was what i replied to him...and gosh,my mood swings like faster than the rocket...geez...one second im fine,one second i feel sad,one second i feel happy...geez...wat's wrong?

break up msg..

hi....sebelum i cakap apa2 i nak minta maaf dulu,jika selama ni i banyak sakit kan hati u...dan i nak ucapkan terima kasih banyak2 untuk apa saja yg u buat untuk i...selama kita kenal...u tau tak sebenarnya kadang2 apa yg kita rancang tak semestinya berjalan seperti yg diharapkan,jadi kuatkan hati u sebab i bukan membenci u,bukan ada perempuan lain dan bukan sebab i marahkan u....tidak ada cacat celanya dari pandangan i,cantik manis sama macam manusia lain,apa pun situasinya kita tetap bole jadi kawan dan soal jodoh semuanya kerja tuhan,i tak nak tipu u,setelah sekian hari ini i mengenali u i cuba untuk cari keserasian antara u dengan i....jelas sekali sebenarnya sayang i pada u berbatas tidak bole diberi lebih....sebab hati ni tak bole nak dipaksa lagi....i harap u faham....tiada soal atau isu lain selain isu mengenai hati kita sendiri...setiap perlakuan u sebenarnya tidak sesuai untuk i mungkin disebabkan kisah silam i,i dh tak tau macam nak layan perempuan,manja u,comel u sebenar nya sangat istimewa tp sayang sebab ia bukan untuk i,sebaliknya orang lain,mungkin jodoh u nanti i tak tau dan i tak tau apa akan jadi kat i lg 2 3 tahun...i minta u faham isi hati i,i tanak pura2,dan i tak bole tipu hati i...u baik dan u bole jadi lg baik dari sekarang...bukan i tak suka kat u tak sayang kat u,tapi keserasian antara kita tiada,jadi i dah fikir masak2 lagi lama hubungan kita nanti hati kita akan jadi lagi rumit,dan mulai sekarang kita kawan je tak lebih dari itu,i minta maaf.

that was a break up message i received...tak paham r,everything was fine..just because my status kat facebook merepek2 emonyer,dia rasa aku jadi gila sbb dia r?weh,ingat aku xda keje lain nak bwat dari jadi gila hanya sbb seekor jantan yang tak tau nak menghargai apa yg dia ada???arghhh.....fuck la....fuck!!!!and all my fucking problems pun had to start at the same time la kan?babi sial pukimak cibai hanjing sial!!!arghhhhh....

men and women

what's up with men? its so hard to understand them, and its so hard for them to understand us girls...

MEN:
-stupid
-straight
-lame
-heartbreakers
-cold
-heartless
-suckers!!

WOMEN:
-smart
-flickered minded
-emotional
-hot
-loving
-annoying at times
-good at planning
-soft hearted

so, basically, men and women are two different human beings with different brain shape i guess..hahahaha...

-xoxo-

latest newsflash about my love life..

so,
latest news,
dlguy dont call me anymore,i think he sorta get the hint(me not answering his calls)
but,i feel bad though..hmm..

but sharif,he's nice..ive been changing alot..having lotsa sense now in my head too due to sharif lecturing me alot..hahahaha....sweet..i find he cute in ALL WAYS!!!hahaha...

XOXO~

special edition for my love...

there are simple things that i find sooo amazing,
the simple things that u do,
the simple but amazing things that happen between us..

i love how my heart beats waiting to see u,
i love how u talk sense into me,
i love the way u clench your teeth when u cant resist looking at me,
i love the way u smell,
i love how your smell stick to my palm when we let go of our hands,
i love how your eyes whispers to me saying that u r all mine,
i love it when we talk for hours on the phone,
and how my legs just cant stop moving when im talking to u,
MOST OF ALL, I LOVE BEING IN LOVE WITH U...

i appreciate every single second spending time with u,
i appreciate every moment i spend with u,
and i want to spend the rest of my life,feeling more...

i <3>