Sunday, May 23, 2010

bullshitting 101~#48-Read and Shut It Up!!

Dear Readers,
Specifically, sisters, cousins, aunty or uncle...

1) I'M SUPER DUPER PISSED AT YOU WHO CANT SEEM TO SHUT AFTER READING!GO FUCK YOURSELF BITCH!!(whoever you are)

2) THANKS TO YOU, YOU JUST MADE MY RELATIONSHIP LEVEL WITH MY FATHER, SUPER LOW!!!

3) MAYBE YOU THINK IT WOULD ACTUALLY MAKE HIM REALIZE, WELL GUESS WHAT, YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY FUCKING WRONG. IT BACK FIRES BACK TO ME YOU BITCH!

Dear those who reads my blog,
I write, I trust.
Wow, never once, I expected some effed up related person to me, would read and tell my father that I wrote a post bout my father. What a fucking bitch you are.

You,
My blog is my only bestfriend in my world. Even relatives ditch me, what more sisters or so called friends. Im all alone in this world. Yes, sounds pathetic, but I pray no one ever go through what I've been through. I can only write things in my blog. To me, I should share some personal stories to the world, so it would be a lesson to others, and to let others know that there are such things that happens in this world. But wow, I never expected you(whoever motherfucking bitch you are) to go and report bout this to my dad. Ya, why don't you go report that I wrote a special mother fucking story for you and that I called you a mother fucking bitch?!

Gosh,how stupeed can you be? 

But if you are my sister, and you are trying to pay back to what I've done,CONGRATULATION! Im one step to disowning my family. So there, you can go live happily ever after with your so called 'family'!!
But if you are my other sister, why, why do you have to report?Why on earth have I done to you? I kept all your secrets all these while, but you keep breaking mine...
But if you are my cousin, what the fuck weh? I dont bother you, why you gotta come into my already effed up life and make it even more effed up?
But if you are my uncle or aunty, gosh, geez, thanks alot for being one hell of a great aunt/uncle.

To you(whoever you are), seriously, I totally blame you, for making my percent of love towards my father, way low...Its like the SIMS2 game, where there is a relationship level % thingy, ya, mine just reached, 20% or 30%...Thank u..seriously..THANKFUCKYOU!!

I CURSE THOSE WHO READ MY BLOG AND CANT SHUT...I CURSE YOU!I NOW PRAY THAT YOU'D GO THROUGH THE SAME FUCKING SHIT I GO THROUGH.I CURSE YOU TO HAVE A LIFE LIKE MINE!b1tCh.

p/s: sorry dear readers who don't go telling my family bout my sacred blog. =) sorry. this post is totally not for you, IF you are not the one. ;)

u kno u love me,
-x.o.x.o.-

Sunday, May 16, 2010

bullshitting 101~#47-Imagine again

Let's play imagine game again.

Dear readers, 
Have you had someone you love close to you, but they are not actually close to you? You lived with your family, but, it feels like they are strangers? Calling someone 'mom' or 'dad', but, they don't actually act as one? Imagine, it's always wrong time to have a talk with them. Imagine, he or she always doesnt have time for you, but have time for others. And even if you asked them for help, they complain to much just to help you with a simple task? Imagine having to miss the person who use to shower you with so much love and care and attention, but one day, he or she just changed and don't seem to have time for you anymore...Well yes, time changes people, but, I didnt know time changes parents. Then one day, you realize that you don't see your father as a father anymore, you see him as a bank, just for school money, or as a private home tutor, cause he's good in alot of stuff..Have you felt all that? Maybe some of you actually did felt that before...But some of you might don't even know what is a father, or never even felt a father's love. Well, at least, that is way better than receiving and loving a person, then suddenly, that person just don't seem to have time for you anymore. 

I have felt it. I am going through it. Ive never realized it, but today, there was an incident that made me realize bout it. And I told my self, "OMG, I don't know who that man is anymore, he's just a person I go to for school money, and for help on some study stuff"..The incident that occured today, few hours ago, has really test my patience. I almost shouted at them.I almost felt like killing them. But, while going through that incident, talking to myself, tears was just dancing in my eye, waiting to flow down my skin like a river's flow..Next moment, I found myself in my room, praying for God to give me all the strength I need to face this test, this incident. And thank God, He helped me go through that anger moment. And now, here I am, sharing you what happens in the world of today.

Dear parents of the world, do not, ever, stop giving attention to your child..Eventhough they have gone matured, they are still a human being. Humans love receiving attention. Realizing or not, all of us somehow, in different situation, in different types of matters, we all love the attention..And never put others 1st. Your child is the seed of you.Growing up moments, they need you the most. Do not ever tell them to quiet and go away when they come to you while you're watching some stupid politics news.I swear, I curse the effing politic system!And also, give and take with your child. They help you when you asked them for help eventhough they do make those 'lizard noises'...

Dear Dad, I wished I didnt loose you to time. I wish you were still the same you, who used to have all the time in the world for me. I wished all this didnt happen. Most of all, I wished that you realized all these...

Now, Imagine...

u know u love me,
-x.o.x.o.-

Saturday, May 15, 2010

bullshitting 101~#46 - 15.05.2010 update

Well well,
Where do I begin this...hmm...OHH...

So, in the previous post, I said that I was gonna fail right?
Well, apparently, I only failed the one subject I know I wanted to fail =) but the other one, I passed..But I did consider retaking...So I registered..
Then suddenly, my dad said that he has no money for the retake fees..So I had to drop it..but hey, I proceed to the next semester ok...haha..But, I hope I can do it and score well this time..Pity mommy n daddy...hmmm...

So far, that's all I can update for now..

Oh, BTW, YES, I AM STILL SINGLE ok!!hahaha...trying to be single la..sick of love..it's like a meditation moment ok..hahaha...

ok then...keep checking for more updates aite..will try to update always...

u kno u love me,
-x.o.x.o.-