bullshitting 101~#48-song for my family and note for Tash.

The song of the day today:

"When We Die" by Bowling For Soup
Well, I know that it's early
And it's too hard to think
And the broken empty bottles
Are reminder in the sink
But I thought that I should tell you
If it's not to late to say
I could put back all the pieces,
They just might not fit the same

Nothing's worth losing
Especially the chance to make it right

And I know that we're gonna be fine
And the tattooed mistakes
Are gonna fade over time
As long as we live, time passes by
And we won't get it back when we die

Well, I know it's been years now,
And I don't look the same
And the hopes and dreams you had for me
You thought went down the drain.
And the room feels so empty
where my pictures used to be
And I can't say that I blame you,
But you can't blame me

Cuz nothing's worth losing
Especially the chance to make it right

And I know that we're gonna be fine
And the tattooed mistakes are gonna fade over time
As long as we live, time passes by
And we won't get it back when we die

Come over
Come over

Cause I gotta know,
If I am doing this all on my own

Come over
Come over

How can I show you if you're not here

And I know that we're gonna be fine
And the tattooed mistakes
Are gonna fade over time
As long as we live, time passes by
And we won't get it back when we die

And I know that we're gonna be fine
And the tattooed mistakes
are gonna fade over time
As long as we live, time passes by
And we won't get it back when we die

 

Today, 8th June 2010.

I wrote on my sister's facebook wall. I kept it too long, I had to burst it out. Ive realized, no one is gonna acknowledge me anyways, so, I should just shut and keep it inside. Let me hurt, let me burn myself, but, I dont want anyone else to feel what I feel, its just too painful.

I wrote:

for the f*** of my satisfaction, i cant do this, i had to say it...
"I miss those moments we had, those free life we had, nothing to worry situation, that only one day i had being with just u(the day ur alien in ur toe went away,we went to abudhabi mall), those singing and dancing days, those sitting on bed watching mov...ie day,those goin crazy finding for the stupid kaleido baju day, those getting to look at u everysinglebloodydayafterloosingUfor4bloodyeffingyearsandnowlostyouagain days, those hugs, those waves, your voice, ur bloody annoying always moody days(lol),most of all, i miss you."
goodbye.  

owh,also,those doshing moments, those lying down in ur bed when u're at work and i was crying hard not believing im finally seeing u after ages and nothing or no one was getting in my way of just being with u(i kno,sounds effing lesbo,but i aint it ok!),camwhoring,walking and holding ur hands(just like how i use to hold ur hands when we walked in kajang...)
The reason why i just cant stop from feeling all this, coz u were the one who actually cared for me since i was small.u were like a mom to me.u nurtured me.u let me sleep on ur thighs all the way when we were in thailand.u took care of me.i guess,all im trying to say is, thank u.

u know u love me,

-x.o.x.o.-